Monday, October 3, 2011

The Secret Writer Clubhouse

I'm about to share a big secret with you. I could get in big trouble for doing this, but here goes.

There is this Clubhouse for Writers. That's right, a Secret Clubhouse. Inside, writers have lots of wine and cheese and chocolate truffles. They compare notes on how many awards they've won, dash off brilliant manuscripts with one hand while the other is being manicured, and dab their brows with advance checks that have lots of zeroes on them. Adoring fans who totally get their work and remember all the minor characters' names buzz around, asking brilliant thought-provoking questions. Oh yeah, and there's a Jacuzzi.

But one writer is not invited to the clubhouse. That writer stands barefoot in the snow, seeing the lights and hearing the laughter from afar. Shivering. Batting off attacking adverbs and slogging through a plot that has developed pointless tentacles. Wondering how those other writers seem to have it so easy. They all know each other, they get the buzz, they never cry over a chapter that goes nowhere. They never get rejection slips.

I think most writers suspect they are that lonely writer out in the snow.

And here's the real secret:

There is no clubhouse.

(Or if there is, I don't know about it so I must be the one out in the snow, and you? You're totally fine. :-) Have some truffles.)


  1. I'm planning an imaginary trip to New Zealand where they're gearing up for summer. I'm sure they have wine and chocolate and jacuzzis there. Wanna come?

  2. Sure, Angelina. Just let me hook up my imaginary flying reindeer to my imaginary sleigh. (Santa lets me use it in the off season.)

  3. There isn't exactly a clubhouse, but if you've ever been to the Bouchercon, well, there are definitely conventions! Bouchercons are a magical gathering of crime authors where there are many many books and there is always booze and caffeine. And scourged sheep's head. You'll just have to trust me on this.

    The biggest secret: all are welcome!

  4. I knew it!

    Now I feel like having some truffles...

  5. Lisa, yes, I've been to conferences that feel magical for a while. And then I come back to regular life and the coach turns back into a pumpkin. ;-)

    Mieke: have a few truffles for me!